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I Have My Divorce to Thank for Getting Me to Italy

People ask me all the time why and how I ended up in Italy.

The truth?

I got divorced.

Starting from Scratch

Me after a post-divorce meltdown on a hike in the Dolomiti

When I was married, we'd talked about traveling for a few years after our son graduated high school. Staying in Bali for six months...then France...India...Japan...

When my marriage ended seven years ago, I felt adrift in more ways than one. I was pissed that now I couldn't travel around the world like we'd planned.


...could I?

It took a major shift in perspective, but I realized the fact that I was single didn't need to hold me back from doing anything in life.

I started solo travel. Instead of it being scary and depressing, I absolutely LOVED it.

I began to think about that big trip after Max graduated. Only, when I asked myself where I really wanted to be (since the idea of living out of a suitcase for two years wasn't appealing), the answer was unequivocally...


Leaving My Own Nest

When you have the (seeming) safety and security of a relationship, you're in your own nest, just like your kids. When you fall out of that nest for one reason or another, it can be fucking terrifying.

The decision to move to Italy, leaving behind everything I'd ever known was the second hardest thing I'd ever done. Divorce being the first. But in the years that I'd had to heal, I knew: I could do hard things.

Divorce Offers a Second Chance at Life

When I was in the thick of divorce proceedings, I told someone I'd just met that I was getting divorced.

"Congrats," he said.

I looked at him, puzzled.

"No one ever regrets getting divorced," he said.

That has stuck with me.

It's because of my divorce that I stumbled onto my spiritual path.

It's because of my divorce that I've worked harder to be a better human.

It's because of my divorce that I started traveling by myself.

It's because of my divorce that I moved to Italy on my own.

I know a surprising number of women here in Italy that are divorced. Who decided to have a fresh start in a new life of their own choosing.

I look at it two ways: you can choose to play the victim after a life-upheaving change like divorce...

...or you can use it as an opportunity to choose what you want out of life. Then get it. In Italy or anywhere in the world.

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